A few words/phrases whose usage should not be tolerated

"Pass the calci"
Its calculator . Not your pet whom you lovingly call it by its nickname.

"Heyyyyyyyyy. How are yoouuuuuuuuu????"(in sms or chat)
Its "hey". Not heyyyyyyyyy.
Its "you". Not youuuuuuuu.
Please keep such extreme enthusiasm to yourself.
Dont subject others to it.
Also it is highly unnecessary to use extra letters.its as if you are trying to cover up the fact that you dont have anything worthwhile to say so you fill up the chat box with extra alphabets.
Bottle up the enthusiasm and store it. Sell it on ebay later.

"Hey,thoda shift na."
Its "hey,shift" or "hey,shift please".
There is absolutely no need to show that you know all 3 languages .

"Its ma thing,yo"
Its not ma.its "my".ma means mother,you extra-cool-people.
And no need to attach a yo to the end of every sentence. We already got from "ma" that you are very cool.

"Im said like..and she said like...and then i went like.."
Please delete the word like from your vocabulary. Please. For the good of humanity.